Title: First Impressions |
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Chapters 1-5 |
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Chapter 1 Sydney sits in a booth at Hobee’s, sipping a coffee. She’s alone, waiting for Anne Koss to arrive. Anne is a professor at Stanford University, and an old friend of her mother’s. Anne and Laura Bristow both taught together at UCLA before Laura died. Since then, Anne moved to Palo Alto to teach at Stanford, but she’s remained in contact with Sydney. This summer she’s invited Sydney to stay with her for a few weeks, and Sydney is overjoyed. She loves spending time with Anne. She’s a lot of fun, and she reminds her of her mother. Her father is a dichotomy. After hours of arguing with him, Sydney could not convince him that he shouldn’t send her nanny to Palo Alto with her. It took a phone call from Anne to finally persuade him. Anne didn’t want her there any more than Sydney did, she would just get in the way. However, after all that, he didn’t give a second thought to dropping her off alone at a restaurant in a strange town to wait for Anne. Sydney has a hard time figuring him out. Her nanny says that Sydney is just like him, but to her that’s the highest insult anyone could give her. The waitress comes by and asks her if she’d like a refill. She’s surprised since it was hard to get the coffee in the first place. The waitress asked her if she wanted a soda or some juice, and looked at her strangely when she asked for a coffee. Sydney is fourteen years old, but people often mistake her for younger. She knows she has an elfin quality and that her breasts haven’t really developed yet, but it’s frustrating. Sydney looks over at a table of young men not far away. They are pretty boisterous, but one of them is quieter, listening in more than participating, but still laughing along with them. He’s very cute, and Sydney feels butterflies in her stomach. He’s got short and spiky sandy blond hair. He’s looking away, so she can’t tell the colour of his eyes, but she can see that he’s got a cleft chin. There’s nothing cuter than that. He’s wearing a red Vuarnet t-shirt and stone washed Guess? jeans. He looks so cool. He looks around and catches Sydney’s gaze. He smiles at her and she looks away quickly, embarrassed to be caught staring at him. “Sydney!” a familiar voice says from behind her. “Anne!” Sydney says, getting up to hug her. “Have you been here long?” Anne asks, sitting down across from her in the booth. “Not that long.” ”Where’s your dad?” Anne asks, glancing around. “Gone. He dropped me off,” Sydney tells her. “He dropped you off?” Anne asks incredulously. Sydney knows that Anne disapproves of the way Jack is raising Sydney. Who can blame her? “Yeah, but it’s really fine. It’s much more pleasant for both of us this way. Especially after the drive from L.A., that was torture. We barely spoke all the way up here.” Anne just shakes her head and Sydney can tell she is holding herself back from criticizing Jack. She needn’t hold back on Sydney’s account, her opinion of her father isn’t especially high. But she knows that Anne would never do that, it’s just not in her nature. Sydney and Anne sit and chat for a while, catching up on each other’s lives. The waitress comes and they order their food. It’s two o’clock in the afternoon but they both order breakfast food. Hobee’s is famous for their breakfasts. Anne is asking Sydney about school when someone stops at their table. Sydney looks up and it’s him. “Hello Professor Koss,” he says to Anne. He then looks at Sydney. “Hi,” he says. Sydney feels herself blush. She smiles weakly at him, but she’s shy around boys her own age, never mind college boys. “Hi Michael,” Anne says, smiling at him. “This is Sydney Bristow. She’s a friend of mine visiting from L.A. Sydney, this is Michael Vaughn, he’s in my Modern Literature class.” “Hi,” Sydney says shyly, barely looking at him. He smiles at her. “Well, I just thought I’d drop by your table to say hello. I’ll see you in class,” he says to Anne. “Yes, see you then,” Anne nods. “Bye,” he says to Sydney. She lifts up her hand and gives a small wave as he walks away. Sydney looks down at the table and waits for her embarrassment to die down. The food comes and Sydney is thankful for the distraction. She hopes that Anne didn’t notice her social ineptitude. “Michael is a good looking young man,” Anne says, well aware of what Sydney is feeling. “Um hmm,” Sydney agrees, trying to act nonchalant. “He’s a little old for you, though,” Anne teases. “Do you have a boyfriend?” “Um, no,” Sydney says, shaking her head. “I think I just displayed how good I am at talking to boys.” “Oh Sydney, don’t worry, you’ll get better. You’ve got lots of time.” Their food comes and Sydney and Anne laugh and chat while they eat. Sydney attacks her stack of pancakes, which are amazingly good. Anne comments on her appetite, but Sydney counters with the fact that she needs the energy for track. It may be summer, but she wants to make the track team when she starts high school in the fall, so she’s been training like mad. “Well, you can use the track on campus while you’re here if you like,” Anne offers. “Yeah, that would be great,” Sydney replies. She knows that Anne doesn’t live very far from the campus, so she can walk or ride Anne’s bike there in the mornings. They continue to catch up while they finish their meal. Sydney loves sitting here talking to Anne. She imagines that this is what it would be like to talk to her mother if she were alive. Instead all she has is her emotionally unavailable father and her nanny, who’s paid to be nice to her. But for a few weeks this summer, she gets to have an almost mother. This is the happiest she’s been in a long time. Chapter 2 Sydney walks across campus in the direction of Cobb Track. She loves the early morning. The grass is dewy and makes a satisfying swishing noise as she walks through it. She doesn’t care that it’s getting her shoes wet, they are her favourite Nikey sneakers, but they’re old and beginning to fall apart. She knows she will need new ones before the fall rolls around. She loves the solitude of the early morning too. There is hardly anyone else around as she moves through the campus. When she reaches the track she sees only one other runner. Sydney takes off her hooded jacket and sets it down in the bleachers. She does warm up stretches and puts her headphones on, clipping her Walkman to her waistband. The sounds of Fine Young Cannibals waft to her ears. She begins to run, her ponytail swishing back and forth across her shoulders. The other runner, a guy, has stopped at the bleachers and is drinking from a bottle of water. He’s far enough away that she can’t really make him out, and she’s just as glad. She doesn’t want her run ruined by worrying about being an idiot in front of another member of the opposite sex, yesterday was bad enough. She hates that she can’t even look at a member of the male half of the species without blushing, and she hates that Anne had to see her that way. She shakes her head briefly and tries not to think about it. All she wants to think about is her run. The other runner has started up again and she is not far behind him. He starts out slowly and she easily catches up to him, looking down as she passes him. “Hey,” she hears from behind her. She turns to look at him as he catches up to her. It’s him. Of course it’s him, an opportunity for Sydney to be mortified always beats the odds of coincidence. “Sydney, right?” he asks. “Yeah,” she says, smiling shyly at him. “And you’re Michael.” “Yeah,” he says, laughing a little bit. Sydney chastises herself for being so stupid. He knows his own name; he doesn’t need her to tell him. “Mind if I run with you?” “No, that’s fine,” she says. Honestly she does mind a little, how is she supposed to focus on her run when she has to try to think of things to say? Luckily, Michael doesn’t seem to want to talk either, and they run side by side in silence. “You’re a good runner,” Michael compliments her when they slow down. “How old are you, anyway?” “Fourteen,” she tells him. She’s still feeling shy, but he’s really friendly and he makes her feel somewhat at ease. “Fourteen, really?” he repeats. “Are you on the track team at your school?” “Well, I was, and I’m hoping to make it when I start high school in September.” “You shouldn’t have any problem,” he says. Sydney blushes at the compliment. “What about you, are you on the track team here?” she asks. “Me? No, I’m not that good. I just run for recreation. And to keep in shape for hockey in the fall.” “Oh, I didn’t know they had hockey here,” she says, sitting down on the bleachers. “They don’t have varsity hockey, but it’s a club sport here. We play out of Redwood City.” “What position do you play?” Sydney asks. She doesn’t know very much about hockey, but that’s a pretty safe question to ask in any team sport. “Right wing,” he tells her. Sydney nods as if she knows what that is. Then there’s silence. She doesn’t really know what else to say. What does a fourteen year old girl say to a college guy she’s just met? She is trying hard to find something to say, but she’s drawing a blank. “So you’re a friend of Professor Koss’?” Michael asks, breaking the silence. “Yeah, well, she and my mom were friends, they taught at UCLA together,” she tells him. Sydney sees Michael react to the past tense in her statement, but he is too polite to ask about it. She doesn’t really want to talk about it, so she moves the conversation along. “So you’re in A… in Professor Koss’ Modern Lit class? How do you like it?” she asks him. “I like it, she’s a great prof. She makes it almost bearable to be here during the summer,” he grins. “Why are you here now?” “Uh, I had to make up a couple of credits. And I decided I’d rather do it now and be completely finished at the end of next year,” he explains. “Oh, so you’re going into fourth year then?” Sydney asks and Michael nods in response. This gives her an idea of his age. He must be twenty or twenty-one. Much too old for her. The thought alone causes the blush to creep back to her cheeks. “Well,” he says, standing up, “I’d better get going. It was nice bumping into you again. Maybe I’ll see you here again.” “Yeah,” she says, smiling at him. “Bye Sydney Bristow,” he says over his shoulder and smiles as he walks away. Sydney leans back against the bleachers as a huge smile covers her face. She spent about half an hour with a college boy, an incredibly cute college boy, and she didn’t act like a complete dork. Her heart beats wildly as she thinks of his smile, directed at her. He has a gorgeous smile, slightly lopsided and with soft looking lips. Sydney wonders what it would feel like if he kissed her with those lips, but quickly admonishes herself. He is way too old for her. A man, really, and she’s barely hit puberty. He’s undoubtedly not a virgin, and Sydney hasn’t even had her first kiss. She shakes her head and sighs. There’s no use dreaming about something you can’t have. Of course, it’s not like she can have boys her age either. They never notice her, always going for the pretty, outgoing girls. Like Heather and Jennifer, the two most popular girls in the eighth grade. Both are blonde, both wear make-up, and most importantly, both are… developed. Sydney looks down at her chest and wonders if she’ll ever develop. And as for make-up, she has no idea how to apply it. That’s something a mother is supposed to teach her daughter. She remembers watching her mom put on make-up when she was little. Sydney would sit on her mom and dad’s bed and watch as her mom expertly applied eyeliner, rouge, lipstick and other mysterious products. Sydney’s nanny is no help, she doesn’t even wear make-up. Chap Stick is as adventurous as she ever gets. Sydney gets up to leave when she sees a metal object catch the sun in the grass. She bends down and retrieves it. It’s a man’s watch. It looks very expensive, but the hands have stopped moving. She wonders if it was the dewy grass that caused it to stop, or if it was stopped before. “I wonder if this is Michael’s,” she muses under her breath. Sydney tries to remember if she noticed him wearing it when she first met him yesterday, but she can’t remember looking at his wrist. She puts it in her pocket anyway. She will give it to Anne to ask Michael if it’s his, and if it’s not she can turn it in to lost and found. Sydney puts her hand in her pocket and fingers the watch and she feels a thrill race through her as she reconsiders her plan. She could just go to Anne’s class and return the watch to him herself. She reasons that she doesn’t have anything better to do when Anne is teaching, but truthfully she knows that she’s just making excuses to see Michael again. But what can it hurt? She knows he has no interest in her, she’s just a kid. But when she thinks of him, it feels like an electric current travels through her body. She’s never felt this way before about anyone, and she can’t help but crave seeing him again. Sydney starts walking toward the building that houses Anne’s office. Anne drove Sydney to the campus this morning, claiming that she had work to do before her first class. Anne is not a morning person, and Sydney has a feeling that she rarely comes to campus this early, but that she didn’t want Sydney to have to come alone. Sydney smiles at her concern. Sydney reaches Anne’s office and finds her on the phone. Anne waves her in and Sydney sits in a chair opposite Anne’s desk. “Alright, tell him I’ll do it… Perfect… Goodbye,” Anne says, hanging up. “Did you have a nice run?” Anne asks, smiling at Sydney. “Yeah, I did,” Sydney says, smiling in memory of her run with Michael. “Good. What would you like to do for the rest of the day? I’m afraid I’ve got a class from 11:30 until 1:00, but I’m all yours after that. I can give you the keys to the house if you would like to go home until then.” “What class is it?” Sydney asks nonchalantly. “Modern Literature. Why, would you like to sit in? The material is quite advanced, but any daughter of Laura Bristow’s will probably be able to keep up,” Anne says, complimenting both Sydney and her mother. “That would be really great,” Sydney says. The idea of sitting in on the class where he would be thrilled her, but she is pleased on another level as well. Sitting in on Anne’s class is the nearest she could get to sitting in on a class of her mother’s. “Well, we’ve still got three hours until then. Would you like the house keys?” “Actually, I think I’ll go check out the library,” Sydney tells her. She loves libraries, and she’s been itching to see Stanford’s. “Okay,” Anne nods in agreement, “meet me back here at 11:00 and we’ll go to the class together.” Sydney leaves Anne’s office and begins walking toward the main library. Anne gave her a map of campus to consult before she went to the track this morning, and so far she’s managed not to get lost. Sydney feels elated. She is going to see Michael again. Her stomach does a flip and she can’t help but grin. She realizes that this is just a crush, but it feels good. And since feeling good is slightly foreign to Sydney, she’s not going to deny herself the tiniest pleasure of admiring someone, even if she knows her feelings will never be returned. Chapter 3 Sydney and Anne walk into the classroom where Anne’s Modern Lit class will start in about ten minutes. Most of the students are already there, with only a few stragglers left to come. Sydney sits down in a seat near the front of the room and discreetly looks around to see if Michael is there. She spots him at the back of the room and her heart starts to thump in her chest. He’s looking down at his notebook, which allows her to gaze at him for a moment. Michael picks up his pen and begins to chew on the end, and Sydney half wonders how she could possibly get her hands on that pen. A pretty girl is sitting in the seat next to Michael, and she leans over to whisper something in his ear. Sydney watches as Michael laughs and turns to her, whispering something in response. Sydney’s heart sinks to her stomach. She wants to turn around but she feels rooted to her spot. The girl puts her hand on Michael’s arm and he smiles at her. “Alright, let’s talk about Kerouac,” Anne says from the front of the class. Michael looks up towards her, catching Sydney’s eye before she can turn back around. He smiles at her and gives her a little wave, but she’s too embarrassed to wave back. She turns around, mortified to be caught staring at him once again. Sydney tries to pay attention to what Anne is saying, but all she can think about is Michael. She feels so stupid for being there. As much as she wants to see Anne teach, she should have come to a class that Michael wasn’t in. The only reason that she came to this one in particular was to see him, and that is ridiculous. She knows he would never be interested in her. Sydney’s logical side tells her that she wouldn’t even want him to be interested in her because, well, she wouldn’t want him to be the kind of guy who would be interested in a fourteen-year-old girl. But seeing him with that girl really bothers her and she wishes she were anywhere but here. The class ends and Sydney waits while Anne talks to a student at the front of the class. “Hey,” says a voice from behind her. “Hi Michael,” she says, looking up at him. “What did you think of the class?” he asks. Sydney looks around to see if the girl he was with is still around, but she must have left. Sydney feels strange sitting down looking up at him, so she stands up. She may only be fourteen, but when she stands up she is almost as tall as he is and it makes her feel like less of a little kid. “It was good,” she answers. “I love Kerouac.” Although she didn’t pay much attention during the lecture, she did at least pick up what Anne was talking about. “You’ve read Kerouac?” Michael asks, surprised. “Yeah. Don’t sound so surprised.” “I am surprised!” he says, “I don’t know very many fourteen year olds who have read Kerouac. When I was fourteen, I don’t think I read anything heavier than Sports Illustrated.” “I like to read,” Sydney says, smiling and shrugging. “Oh hey, I found this at the track this morning. Is it yours?” she asks, pulling the watch out of her pocket. “Yeah!” Michael says, taking it from her. “Oh my God, thank you. I didn’t know where I’d lost it and it’s really important to me.” He slides it on his left wrist and fastens it. “It’s stopped though, I don’t know if that happened while it was lying in the grass.” “No, actually I noticed that it stopped yesterday. I’ll have to bring it in somewhere to get fixed, I guess.” “Michael,” Anne says, joining them, “are you waiting to speak with me?” “No,” he replies, “I was just talking to Sydney. I left my watch at the track this morning and Sydney found it.” “Oh, Sydney, you didn’t tell me you saw Michael at the track this morning,” Anne comments. “Um hmm,” Sydney nods, blushing. She really has to stop doing that. People are going to start thinking that red is her natural colouring. “Well, I’m gonna take off,” Michael says. “See you later.” “Bye Michael,” Anne says. “Bye,” Sydney manages to squeak out. Anne turns to Sydney and looks at her oddly. Sydney’s cheeks are still flaming and she looks away, not wanting to meet Anne’s questioning look. “What do you want to do now, Sydney?” Anne asks, seeming to let the topic of Michael go. “I’m done for the day, so we can do whatever you like.” “I don’t know… shopping?” Sydney suggests. “That’s my girl!” Anne says, beaming. The Stanford Shopping Center is within walking distance, so they decide to walk instead of driving. They chat as they walk along. Anne asks Sydney what she thought of the lecture, and Sydney tells her that it was great, not letting on that she wasn’t paying attention for most of it. “Really, because you seemed a little distracted,” Anne says devilishly. “I did?” Sydney asks. “Yes. Sydney…” Anne trails off. Sydney looks at her expectantly, wondering what she is about to say. “I don’t really know how to say this. I… I can see that you have a crush on Michael.” “You can?” Sydney asks, looking at the ground. “Do you think he can see it?” “Probably not, guys are often oblivious. I just don’t want you to get hurt. You know that Michael is quite a bit older than you and that there isn’t any possibility of anything happening between the two of you, don’t you?” Anne asks seriously. “Yes, I know that. It’s just a crush, a stupid crush,” Sydney says shaking her head. “Okay,” Anne says, “as long as you know that, then there’s nothing wrong with it.” Anne puts her arm around Sydney as they arrive at the shopping center. Sydney and Anne spend the afternoon browsing through the stores and buying a few things here and there. She wishes that Anne lived closer so that they could spend time together on a regular basis. There’s no one else that she can talk to the way she can talk to Anne, and she can’t help thinking once again that this is the kind of thing she would be doing with her mom if she were alive. The thought makes Sydney feel a little melancholy, and she decides that she’s not going to waste what little time she has with Anne by feeling down. “So,” Sydney says, smiling and picking up a floral, mustard coloured vest, “what do you think of this?” Chapter 4 Sydney sits in the library once again, reading. Anne will be busy all day today, but Sydney decided to accompany her to the university anyway. Anne encouraged her to explore Palo Alto a little bit. She may take a walk up University Avenue a little later to peek in some of the shops, but right now she’s content to curl up and read a book. She pulls a long hair off her new pink and white striped Polo shirt, which makes her think of yesterday’s shopping spree with Anne. She smiles, thinking of what a great time they had together. Sydney spent more money than she should have, but her dad probably won’t even notice. Since when did Jack Bristow notice anything about Sydney? One day she’ll shock him by doing something that he’ll have to take notice of. She grins thinking of it, and then shakes her head. She doesn’t think she’ll ever actually do anything shocking. Sydney focuses her attention back to Kafka, but soon finds it wandering again. This time it’s wandering to a certain college student with the most hauntingly beautiful eyes she’s ever seen. She closes her eyes and lets herself fantasize a little. She’s dancing with him, and he’s wearing a black suit. He doesn’t have a tie on, instead the first few buttons of his shirt are undone and she can see his collarbone. She is wearing a sleeveless tight pink dress. She can hear the music surrounding them;
Close your eyes, give me your hand
“Hey.” Sydney jumps at his voice over her shoulder, snapping her quickly out of her fantasy. Having him lean over her shoulder and put his face so close to hers is fuel for a new fantasy though. Sydney is embarrassed, but makes herself look at him. “Hi,” she says, smiling. “Are you following me?” he asks with a grin. “Uh, what? No, I’m just reading,” she answers, flustered. “Relax, I was just kidding, Syd,” Michael says, sitting down in a chair next to her. Sydney feels tingly all over when he calls her Syd. No one shortens her name like that, and she likes the intimacy of hearing it from him. “What are you doing here?” he asks. “Just reading,” she answers. “I like libraries.” “What are you reading?” Sydney flips the book over to show him the cover. “You’re reading Kafka?” he asks rhetorically, shaking his head. “You amaze me, Sydney Bristow.” Sydney can’t believe her ears. Did he just say she amazes him? Wow. She feels a little lightheaded. She smiles at him, not a shy, blushing smile, but a full-wattage smile, showing off her dimples. “Well, you can’t spend your entire vacation in the library,” Michael tells her. “But if you like books, I’ve got a bookstore you should see. I need to go there to see if I can get a particular book. Do you want to come?” Sydney cannot believe this is happening. Michael Vaughn, 20 year old Michael Vaughn, is actually asking her to go somewhere with him. She tries to be calm, telling herself it’s not a date, that he knows she likes books and is just asking her along. But she can’t help but feel incredibly giddy at the idea. “Um, yeah, that would be great. I just have to tell Anne where I’m going,” Sydney says, feeling like a little kid. “That’s fine, I have to go speak with a professor for a minute,” he says. “Do you have a campus map?” Sydney nods and pulls it out. “Okay,” he says, taking it and marking an X on it, “this is where I’m parked. I’ll meet you there in half an hour. Come and tell me either way.” “Tell you what either way?” Sydney asks, confused. “If you can come,” he clarifies. “Oh, I’m sure I can come, I just want to let Anne know where I’ll be.” ~~ “Sydney, I don’t think this is a good idea,” Anne says, somewhat firmly. “Anne, really, it’s no big deal. There’s nothing going on, he just asked me if I wanted to tag along to this bookstore he likes,” Sydney explains breathlessly. She hadn’t considered the idea that Anne might not let her go. They have such a relaxed relationship that Sydney forgets that she is actually in Anne’s care, but it’s painfully obvious now. “Sydney, I just don’t know. What would your father think if I let you go off with a strange boy… a strange young man?” “But he’s not strange, Anne, he’s in your class! You know him,” Sydney protests. Anne sighs and looks at her desk. She looks as if she is considering it and Sydney hopes against hope that she will let her go. She knows that to Michael it’s just a trip to the bookstore with some kid. He’s probably doing her a favour, getting her off campus for awhile. But for Sydney it means so much more. “Please, Anne?” Sydney asks quietly. “Okay,” Anne says, somewhat hesitantly. “All right, but I’d like you to be back here when my class ends at three.” “No problem!” Sydney says, flashing Anne the same grin she gave Michael in the library. She runs behind Anne’s desk and gives her a big hug. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” Sydney leaves, glancing at Anne as she does. Anne looks worried, but Sydney just waves and shuts the door. She makes her way to the parking lot that Michael marked on the map. “I am never throwing this map away,” she says to herself. When she arrives at the lot, she sees Michael standing beside a gold coloured car. It looks like a K-car, kind of boxy and with a hatchback. “Hi,” she says when she gets to him. “Hi,” he says back. “All set?” “Yep.” Michael goes to the driver’s side, and Sydney to the passenger side. “What kind of car is this?” she asks. “This is a 1987 Dodge Shadow. Not the most luxurious car, but it’ll do,” he says, leaving the parking lot. They drive through campus a little and reach El Camino Real. “How far is the bookstore?” Sydney asks as they turn left. “Only a couple of minutes. It’s in Menlo Park,” Michael responds. Michael was right, it isn’t very far. Before long he is parking the car and they’re walking into Kepler’s Books. It’s pretty busy for a weekday afternoon, but it is summer. “I’ll be in the History section,” Michael tells her. “Look around. It’s not that big, so I’m sure we’ll find each other.” It isn’t that big, but it’s bigger than it seems at first. The space is used very effectively. There are books everywhere there possibly can be, creating a atmosphere of being cocooned by books. To a booklover like Sydney, it’s wonderful. Sydney wanders around for quite some time, picking up books that call to her. She is so engrossed in reading the back of one book that she doesn’t hear Michael walk up behind her. “Find anything interesting?” he asks. Sydney jumps. “You really have to stop doing that!” she says, grinning and hitting him playfully. She can’t believe how comfortable she is becoming around him. Yesterday she couldn’t even look at him, and today she’s… flirting? Is she flirting? “You’re an easy target,” he says. “You should try to be more aware of your surroundings.” “I know,” she says, “I get too caught up. Maybe it comes from my dad, he’s pretty distracted most of the time.” Her tone of voice is a little disparaging and she sees Michael pick up on that. “That doesn’t sound good. Don’t you get along with your dad?” “Uh, not especially,” she says. “Why not?” he asks. “That’s a long story that you don’t want to hear,” she says, shaking her head. “Well,” he says, “I’ve got what I came for, do you want to get going?” Sydney’s heart sinks. It’s only one thirty and she doesn’t have to be back to campus until three. She was hoping to spend more time with Michael. But she can’t really tell him that, so she nods. “I really feel like a coffee though,” he says. “There’s a café next door. What do you say?” Sydney feels like dancing. “Sure,” she says, hoping her face doesn’t give away just how happy she is that their time together isn’t ending just yet. Michael pays for his book and they leave the store, walking next door to Café Barrone. There are tables outside, some shaded and some fully exposed to the warm California sun. They choose to sit in the sun. They sit down and order their drinks; a latte for Michael and a café mocha for Sydney. “So, I’ve got some time,” Michael says, “Why don’t you tell me about your dad?” Song: “Eternal Flame” by the Bangles Chapter 5 Sydney looks down into the caramel pool of café mocha in her cup. Michael wants to hear about her dad. She had told him it was a long story, but really it isn’t. It’s pretty simple, actually. “Well, we just don’t get along very well,” she says lamely. “That’s not a long story,” he says, calling her on it. She shakes her head and smiles at him. Picking up her spoon, she begins swishing it through her mocha. “I guess it’s not a long story, not really. I just… I don’t usually volunteer the information because then I get the look.” He looks at her and patiently waits for her to continue. “My mom died when I was six,” she says, waiting for the look of pity and discomfort to cross his face. It doesn’t. “I’m sorry,” he says simply. “Yeah, well, ever since, my dad has been unavailable. He works all the time, and he takes no notice of me. I’ve still got a nanny, which is ridiculous for my age, but it makes his life easier. He did want to ship me off to boarding school, but I somehow managed to convince him to let me stay at home and go to a private high school. The stipulation is that we keep my nanny on until I graduate.” “That’s really awful, Syd. Are you sure you don’t want to go to boarding school, maybe it would be better.” “Uh unh, no way. I know girls who have gone to boarding school, and those places are brutal. Especially all girl boarding schools, which is where I would be going. I’m much better off living at home. Besides, since I don’t cause her any trouble, my nanny lets me do pretty much what I like. I wouldn’t have that freedom at boarding school.” He nods his head in agreement. “Anyway, that’s what my relationship with my dad is like,” Sydney says. “What about you, do you get along with your parents?” Michael smiles and looks past her. His gaze is directed somewhere to her right, but she can see that he’s not actually focused on anything. “I love my parents. My relationship with my mom is great, I really miss her since I’m not living at home anymore. My dad… my dad was great too.” Sydney notices the past tense and is surprised. She is used to having to tell people about her mom, but she’s not used to hearing others tell her about the loss of a parent. “I guess we have something in common,” Michael says. “My dad died when I was young as well.” “Oh. How did he die?” Sydney asks. “Um, he was killed in the line of duty.” “Was he a cop?” “No, but he was in law enforcement.” Sydney realizes that he’s being vague, but she doesn’t push. She figures he doesn’t want to talk about it, so she brings the focus back to herself. “My mom died in a car accident. She and my dad were both in the car, actually,” she says, but leaves off the part that she always secretly thinks; that the wrong parent survived. And then she always feels guilty for thinking it. She loves her dad, she really does. Despite everything, the six year old in her still adores her daddy and seeks his approval. Maybe someday she’ll get it. The mood is somber at the table and Sydney feels that she should change the topic to something a little more pleasant, but she can’t think of anything else to say. She’s not used to conversing with males at all, let alone someone of Michael’s age and intelligence. Surprisingly, though, she finds it pretty easy to talk to him. It’s the way he looks at her, as if he’s actually interested in what she has to say. He doesn’t treat her like a kid. “When we were at the track yesterday,” Michael starts, obviously wanting to change the topic as well, “you said that you were trying out for track in the fall. Doesn’t track usually start in the spring for high school?” “Oh, yeah,” Sydney says, her eyes sparkling at the mention of track, “but the coach at Hammersfield, where I’m going, holds try-outs in September and trains the team all year. They always win, and that’s why. It’s another reason I’m so psyched about not going to boarding school.” “You’re going to have a great time in high school, I loved it,” Michael says. “Sure I am,” Sydney says sarcastically. She has never had a good time in school, always shy and never having that many friends. She can see Michael liking it. He’s so good looking and she’s sure he was really popular. “You’re a pretty girl, the boys will be all over you,” he says, grinning at her. “I’m going to an all girls school,” Sydney says ruefully. Then realizing what he said, she feels giddy and her cheeks redden slightly at the idea that Michael thinks she’s pretty. “Oh. Well I’m sure they’ve got events with boys schools, right?” Sydney nods, but she doesn’t share his confidence that boys will be after her. She has been interested in guys before, but they’ve never even noticed she was around. She’s too shy. “What are you planning to do after next year?” Sydney is curious. “You know something, I have no idea. Have any ideas for me?” he jokes. “No. But I already know what I want to do,” she tells him. “What’s that?” Michael asks. “I want to teach, just like my mom.” “That’s great. I could never teach, it’s just not in me,” he tells her. “I’m sure that’s not true,” Sydney says, shaking her head. They laugh and talk for a long time, feeling like old friends. The age gap really seems to disappear when they talk like this. Part of Sydney can’t help but hope that something can come out of this after all, but mostly she’s just happy that they are becoming friends. “When do you go back to L.A.?” Michael asks. “Another week and a half,” she tells him. “We should hang out more before you leave.” “Yeah, I’d like that,” she says, giving him a dimple-worthy smile. “I’ll be at the track again in the morning if you’d like to run.” “Sure, that sounds good,” he says, nodding his head. Sydney glances down at her watch and panics when she sees that it’s a quarter to three. She told Anne she would be back on campus by three. They’re not very far away, but still. She tells Michael and they get to the parking garage as fast as they can. Sydney checks her watch constantly in the car, pushing on the floorboard to try to make the car go faster. Anne was hesitant to let her go to the bookstore with Michael, but she put her faith in Sydney. Sydney doesn’t want to betray her trust now. Michael parks in a lot not far from Anne’s office and she sprints from the car, waving at Michael and telling him she’ll see him in the morning. Sydney reaches Anne’s office at two minutes to three and sighs in relief. Anne isn’t even back from her last class yet, so Sydney waits for her in the hall. She smiles as she leans against the wall and thinks about Michael. He actually wants to hang out with her! She’s so excited that she squeezes her eyes shut and lets out a little giggle. When she opens her eyes, she is surprised to see Anne standing there. “What are you so happy about?”
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